Each week I’m going to try and do this column. This will be just some random observations that I noticed during the current week of the glorious 2018 NFL football season. There will be 6 observations and an extra point. So you’re essentially getting a touchdown’s worth of football hot takes from me. Enjoy.
1. This is tough for me to say but it’s time for the Giants to bench Eli Manning
For those of you who know me well you know that I live and breathe New York Giants football. It’s one of only a few things that makes me truly happy in life. Well the past two years have absolutely sucked. This year wasn’t supposed to suck.
It’s time for the Giants to give Kyle Lauletta a shot at quarterback. It’s not all Eli’s fault that he can’t play in this league anymore and the reason why this team is 1-7 isn’t all on him. That being said, they’ve gotta see what they’ve got in Kyle Lauletta this year. It shouldn’t stop them from drafting a quarterback in April but you’ve still gotta give that kid a chance. The bye week would be a perfect time for it to happen.
I do believe that the Giants should give Eli Manning a farewell game at home. Let the fans say their proper goodbyes to him just like other New York sports legends like Derek Jeter and Mariano Rivera because he’s on their level of stardom. He’s given his all to a franchise that has failed him for the majority of the second half of his career.
2. FITZMAGIC IS BACK, BABY!!!!
For the two people who have read this column every week (I love you), you may remember that in week 6 I wrote that Jameis Winston throws the most hilarious interceptions of all time. Well, he was in perfect form today:
I loved everything about my life when the Bucs game came onto the Red Zone channel today. Then, it got even better….
RYAN FITZPATRICK ENTERED THE GAME! The living legend has begun another iteration of Fitzmagic. For those of you who don’t remember, here are the stages of Fitzmagic:
- Team’s starter gets suspended/injured/benched
- People say things like, “oh great, now we’ve gotta start Ryan Fitzpatrick”
- Ryan Fitzpatrick performs well and there’s a quarterback controversy
- In layman’s terms, this is peak ‘Fitzmagic’
- Fitzmagic ultimately fades away and he gets replaced
- An NFL GM overpays and/or signs Ryan Fitzpatrick and the process starts again
We currently blew threw the first two stages of Fitzmagic and we are now at the peak of the third stage of Fitzmagic. There’s no way in hell Jameis Winston starts next week.
As football fans, we deserve more Fitzmagic. You never know how many more of these great moments we’re gonna get because he’s already in his mid 30’s.
Do the right thing, Dirk Koetter. You’re gonna get fired regardless.
3. The Steelers went full Browns today for a play but it ultimately didn’t matter because they were playing Cleveland
So the Browns had a holding penalty in the end zone which resulted in a safety (typical Browns) and then this happened on the ensuing free kick:
Did this stop the Steelers from winning the game? No, it did not. It even helped the over hit as the total was 50.5. It was just one of the most bizarre plays that I’ve seen while watching football.
4. Are there any better jerseys than the Bears throwbacks?
No, there are not. These are the best uniforms in the NFL.
As soon as I saw that they were wearing these uniforms I knew that they were going to win the game and win the game big. They did just that.
Stat of the day: The Bears are now undefeated without Khalil Mack compared to just .500 with him. Did Jon Gruden win the trade? (Please sense the sarcasm in that last question).
5. The NFL needs more 4:25pm games
I’m starting this column during the 4:25 games (just to give you a look behind the magic, some of my observations are out of sequence) and we are being robbed of maximum football watchage on the NFL redzone channel. I’m sick of there being 9 games on at 1pm and then being stuck only watching 3 games at 4:25pm.
The 4pm games consist of the Rams beating down a team, the 49ers/Cardinals/Raiders getting beaten down by a team, and the Dallas Cowboys on national TV because the league can’t get enough of their overrated garbage can of a team.
An ideal schedule would have at least four games on at 4:25pm and the rest can be in primetime and 1:00. I don’t ever want to miss a second of the action and the schedule is just too unbalanced this season.
6. The Rams need their new stadium to be done yesterday because sharing with USC has become an absolute disaster
So USC had a game last night which means that by rule of the football universe that the field has to look like absolute garbage for the Rams game:
Plus, even though they’re undefeated, they still get overrun by opposing fans every single game:
Extra Point: As if he didn’t already, Aaron Rodgers 100000% hates his teammates now
So after the Rams took a 2 point lead with around two minutes to play in the game, Aaron Rodgers never got the ball back to try and win the game because the Packers kick returner fumbled the ball:
This comes after his kicker missed 5 field goals in a single game earlier in the year. Aaron Rodgers totally wants all of these people dead.